Saturday, March 23, 2013

The Game-changer: Saying What's On Your Mind

"El que no llora, no mama."

Cancer's Horoscope (Jun 21 - Jul 22) 
Saturday, March 23, 2013

When confronted with unpleasant situations, you often pull into your shell where
you are safely out of harm's way. Unfortunately, the danger of this evasive strategy is
that your unexpressed anger may create more problems now than a short-lived conflict.
You have a chance to positively impact your weekend, but you must be willing to take
a risk and let others know why you aren't happy. Getting your feelings out into the open
can be the game-changer you need to shake up your life.

After reading my horoscope today, I found the above quote to be a perfect fit. Translated the quote means "He who does not cry, does not suckle" or what we know as "A closed mouth does not get fed." This lesson on assertiveness took me years to learn, as well as how to apply it.  A character trait that once defeated me was to not say anything in order to avoid arguing or pushing away someone I wanted in my life. The problem in that was two-fold.  I pondered the situation until I was emotionally weak leaving me without a voice in the friendship/relationship. IF When I finally did bring it up, it was after something else had occurred.  I was also on edge due to multitude of other things I hadn't addressed early on. The bubble would burst -here comes the argument.  An argument I initially attempted to avoid. Once that bridge was crossed, anything and everything, and I place emphasis on EVERYTHING came out of my mouth. Not pretty at all. 

Today, I won't say that I'm a different person. Just older and wiser ;-). I've learned to simply say what's on my mind, while taming my tongue. It was a necessary lesson that now assists me in moving forward and discerning who I should move forward with, even if I truly care for the person. I understand that expressing my thoughts will not always go my way, but I also am enlightened to who around me will listen. We can always agree to disagree. But what I can't have is someone in my circle that is only concerned about their own needs. I believe we all carry a trait of narcissism but the simplest courtesies to another can go the distance. After all, sometimes it really is just that simple. :-)

Journey light,


N/A said...

Thanks for sharing. I, too, suffered from that and still do sometimes, though, it's rarely in personal associations but moreso in Corporate America. I'm glad you found your voice. :)

Unknown said...

Thanks for the comment Shana! The odd thing is I always have been vocal on the job but respectful. However I can see how that can happen with colleagues.