Saturday, February 14, 2009

This Valentine's Day Hoopla!

No - I'm not angry because I'm single. Matter of fact, I need my coupled up friends to stop looking at me like I have leprosy and trying to send me on blind dates. lol. My status is chosen and I embrace it whole heartedly! Don't get me wrong - I'm not against loving relationships . I love the ideal of love, being in love and all that comes with it. As long as he and I are working toward common goals, can enjoy each other as friends, and trust enough in our relationship that we can also have a life outside of each other, I'm down. Plus I need to keep my own place and he keep his :) But anywho, I'm more down with loving myself first. Since my divorce, I have had two relationships and both have proven to be more draining than motivating, therefore I am so in love with me right now, its sick. I'm much more motivated to do the things I enjoying like writing, when my eyes are not all glazed over and my heart is not all involved. Don't know why. It is what it is :)

So I thought in the spirit of self love, I would share this piece I wrote a while back. Until the next time.......journey light.

Luv, peace, and an abundance of blessings

E




I Never Imagined…

I Never Imagined

I never imagined you
Curiosity has me in its hand
Like Alice perusing Wonderland
I journeyed down the rabbit hole
Allowing another chapter to unfold
Reaching the other side untouched
I never realized I’d need you this much
An adventure designed just for me
Desires revealed that only I could see
And now that your presence is known
I’m afraid to let you go back to your home

Before
I had
routines
boredom
uneventful days
predictable nights
thoughts that
screamed
Did I do the right thing?
Did I make the right choice?
Is it too late to change my mind?
You or him?
Him or you?
Constantly I questioned my own rational
My thoughts were inexplicable
This new route played out in my mind
again and again
and I was afraid to start
afraid to move forward alone
But I’ve learned to focus
Focus on you

So I step forward boldly
Claiming my new season
Unyielding to previously failed visions
Shaping and molding new plans
Not limiting my faith to another man
Considering the newness of your smile
Replaying and revising my life’s profile
Appreciating your view of the world and others
Your ability to welcome what life has to offer
While I’ve always struggled with skepticism
Your optimism overrides my pessimism
I enjoy watching your eyes sparkle with anticipation
A look I could never achieve without hesitation
And I thank you for being my friend
I promise to never look back again
but to accept you unconditionally
because after all you are
simply the other side
a reflection of me

2 comments:

Geri said...

You have to love yourself and be happy with yourself before you can be with anyone else. I think it's great that journey has lead to you this point.

In the Dhammapada it says:


If you find an intelligent companion who will walk with you,
who lives wisely, soberly, overcoming all dangers, walk with that person in joy and thoughtfulness.

If you find no intelligent companion who will walk with you,
who lives wisely and soberly,
walk alone like a king who has renounced a conquered kingdom
or like an elephant in the forest.

It is so true, and if I wasn't married to such a great man, I would be like an elephant alone in the forest. Self-love is more important than just being with someone. You are too good to settle. So, don't!

DrkTearz said...

Thanks Geri.....and a special thanks for sharing the words of wisdom through the Dhammapada's teachings